Here’s the list you were waiting for - the top ten best alcoholic drinks in science fiction. The Star Trek universe alone probably has hundreds of beverages, but only three made this list. The #1 sci-fi drink is available worldwide - but can you handle even one shot of it?
10. Juri Juice from Star Wars
Juri Juice was served in the Cantina in Star Wars (aka Episode IV - A New Hope.) I almost put Colt 45 here instead since Lando Calrissian (Billy Dee Williams) loved it so much. I will take this opportunity to say that Han did indeed shoot first. George Lucas’s rationalization for changing this scene holds no water and totally changes the character of Han.
A ridiculously long list of alcohol in Star Wars
9. Brevari from Babylon 5
Brevari is the Centauri national drink. In Centauri culture, sobriety, as opposed to drunkenness, is considered a vice. On the other hand, alcohol has a different effect on the Minbari: “Lennier: Because my people do not react well at all to alcohol. Even a small quantity causes psychotic impulses and violent, homicidal rages.”
8. Romulan Ale from Star Trek
I tried out Romulan Ale at the Star Trek Experience in Las Vegas; it tasted like Budweiser with a bunch of blue food coloring in it.
Memory Alpha has a good description: “Romulan ale is a highly intoxicating alcoholic beverage of Romulan origin with a characteristic blue color (this can range from a pale sky blue to a dark midnight blue, depending on the “vintage”). It takes a while to ferment and is also used for medicinal purposes.”
7. Jawa Juice from Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones
Obi-Wan drank a Jawa Juice beer aka Ardees at Dexter’s Diner in Attack of the Clones. I have no idea if it is the same thing as Juri Juice. I picked Jawa Juice because of the catchy name and also because it gives me the chance to rant a little about Attack of the Clones. Man that movie sucked. The bar scene where they go looking for that assassin is so boring and unoriginal compared to the wonderful cantina in Star Wars (no, I’m not calling it A New Hope.) I’m pissed that I had to watch a little bit of the movie again just to get this screenshot.
Another ridiculously long list of alcohol in Star Wars
6. Coors Beer from E.T. The Extraterrestrial
What is E.T. doing? Drinking beer? I though E.T. was supposed to be a kid’s movie? E.T. makes the kid Elliot drunk because of the psychic link? Coors beer is what he drinks? Great. So the first extraterrestrial to live among humans has Coors beer as his example of what Earth’s alcohol tastes like.
5. Ambrosia from Battlestar Galactica
The re-imagined Battlestar series is known for its alcoholics such as Commander Adama and Colonel Tigh. A popular drink is ambrosia - a green liquid that looks like Midori. Apparently the human survivors devote a lot of time and effort into making beer, wine, and hard liquor because it seems like it’s available anywhere on any ship at any time. I guess they need booze to take their mind off of destruction of the majority of the human race and the ruthless Cylons that are hunting them.
Battlestar Wiki’s Page on Alcohol in the old and new series
4. Library Grape Wine from Neal Stephenson’s Anathem
Here’s a taste of what the library grape is, read the book for a much more detailed Neal Stephenson style description: “Every cell carried in its nucleus the genetic sequences, not just of a single species, but of every naturally occurring species of grape that the Vrone avout had ever heard of … In addition it carried excerpts from the genetic sequences of thousands of different berries, fruits, flowers, and herbs… A given vine could not express all of those genes at once… so it “decided” which of those genes to express — what grape to be, and what flavors to borrow - based on some murky and ambiguous data-gathering and decison-making process that the Vrone avout had hand-coded into its proteins… Nothing the cultivator did or failed to do, went undetected or failed to have its consequences in the flavor of the juice.”
Stephenson also details special wooden casks that age the library grape wine.
3. Synthehol from Star Trek
All I can say about Synthehol is that I want some! It intoxicates, but has no bad side effects.
From Memory Alpha: “Synthehol is a chemical variant of alcohol. It appears to have the same taste and smell as “real” alcohol to most individuals, but none of the deleterious effects associated with alcohol for most humanoids, such as debilitating intoxication, addiction, and alcohol poisoning. Most humanoids have an enzyme which breaks down the alcohol-like compounds in synthehol. According to Data, synthehol’s “intoxicating effects can be easily dismissed”. (TNG: “Relics“)”
2. Klingon Blood Wine from Star Trek
Klingon Blood Wine was available at the Star Trek Experience, but I never got around to trying it. I’ll have to get some whenever the Experience re-opens in downtown Vegas.
From Memory Alpha: “Bloodwine is a popular alcoholic beverage among the Klingons, best served warm. As with many Klingon foods and beverages, it is not for the faint of heart. Bloodwine is known to be highly intoxicating, to the point that most non-Klingons are scarcely capable of handling it; it is twice as potent as whiskey… Klingon captains and generals are fond of carrying several barrels of their favorite vintages to celebrate victories…”
1. Spoiled Milk from Alien Nation
Of course, spoiled milk is #1 alcoholic beverage in sci-fi! It’s the only drink in the list that grosses out humans and gets aliens intoxicated. In the Alien Nation movie and TV series there are scenes of the “Newcomers” pouring out lumpy, rotten, sour milk and gulping it down. Even a virile Klingon warrior in his prime couldn’t handle a shot of this potent drink.
